Oldie, but Timely

Deteriorata

Go placidly amid the noise and waste and remember what comfort
there may be in owning a piece thereof.
Avoid quiet and passive persons unless you are in need of sleep.
Rotate your tires.
Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself and heed well their advice, even though they be turkeys; know what to kiss and when.
Consider that two wrongs never make a right but that three do.
Wherever possible, put people on hold. Be comforted that in the face of all aridity and disillusionment and despite the changing fortunes of time, there is always a big future in computer
maintenance ...
Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls
would scarcely get your feet wet.
Fall not in love therefore; it will stick to your face ...
Reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot, it could only be worse in Milwaukee.
You are a fluke of the universe; you have no right to be here, and whether you can hear it or not, the universe is laughing behind your back.
Therefore make peace with your God whatever you conceive him to be--
Hairy Thunderer or Cosmic Muffin.
With all its hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal, the world continues to deteriorate.
Give up.

-Tony Hendra